Chord Mystic Signature, a New Age higher-level vibrational interconnect cable.

This was published yesterday but may well be of interest to the high end Sound Quality systems merchants out there..
The Chord Company, the UK’s leading high-performance audio and video cable manufacturer and creator of the Tuned ARAY cable-tuning concept, introduces Chord Mystic Signature, a New Age higher-level vibrational interconnect cable.
It was only a matter of time. No group of creative people could work within the vibrational aura of Stonehenge without some of the ancient energy waves that emanate from the mystical stone circle affecting their most creative thought processes.
The Chord Mystic Signature (shown in 1/4″ plug form) is a new interconnect cable designed to allow anyone, anywhere in the world to channel the same immense creative energy waves, that previously only those that live or work within the energy matrix of Stonehenge, have been able to benefit from.
The precisely placed (and very beautiful) crystal formation at each end of the cable collects and focuses primordial energy waves. By placing your hands carefully on any equipment blessed enough to be connected with Mystic Signature, you can channel this energy directly to a new chakra, recently discovered by Chord’s psychic research team. The fundamental chakra is located approximately 10 cm below the coccyx and is the chakra responsible for many of the strange and mysterious utterances that musicians make. Think about it for a minute: it’s no coincidence that Sting has a house in the Woodford valley (well within the energy matrix of Stonehenge).
During the development of the cable used in the creation of the Chord Matrix, Chord’s psychic research team experimented at length with many different crystal formations before settling on a unique blend of copper and unobtainum. This alloy has only previously been used in the creation of crystal wands, but its ability to carry not just electrical, but also vibrational energy, makes it ideal for accurately transmitting a fully realised holistic signal
Each Mystic Signature interconnect can only be built after the production technician has undergone a psychic cleansing process and for the cable to work as intended, it must be built in a special area within Chord’s HQ where two ley lines intersect and create a special energy node. This area was discovered by painstaking divination, carried out by a team of consultant mystics based in Glastonbury.
The Mystic Signature cable can also only be built during a specific phase of the moon in order to ensure that the crystal lattice within the cable is correctly orientated. Because of this, Chord will only be able to produce two Mystic Signature cables each year and in order to ensure maximum energy wave length transfer the Mystic Signature interconnect is only available in precise lengths of 1.7563211900 metres.
Music lovers are advised to place their orders for the Mystic Signature cable now; the waiting list for this exciting and wind-breaking new interconnect is only ten years’ long.